oh l'amour

'but having someone and wondering isn't always the best feeling either'

that's really a good point.
and it made me think quite a bit once the '29' showings were done. [shame that these goofy movies were in some ways better than most of what it is at 'final cut', although copying a style is much easier than creating your own]

the stakes do get higher when you have someone in your life.

and from what i have heard, it's harder still once you are married [let me know if i'm off about this].

'and nothing can prepare you for that moment [when the kids come]. from that point on, your life, as you know it, is changed forever.'
'no one ever tells you things like that.'

is this all true?
does it only get harder?

yes, i think.

but does that mean its worse?

i give you a resounding 'no!'

when i was a d.p. on projects, it was more of a headache and carried more stress than as a camera assistant. but did i want to go back? of course not. it was much more fun as a cinematographer, despite having to deal with days so bad that the producer had to call me on the phone that night and assure me that we would make it through somehow [thanks, em].

i believe in love.
i believe that it is good and great.
i believe that it is undoubtedly worth all the work it takes to plant and cultivate it.

and i think it is good to take time and enjoy where i'm at, and not spend so much time looking backward or forward.

play what you can play.