Sunday, October 30, 2011

another brick in the wall

we were going in to visit the ginkaku-ji in kyoto one morning when renee and i were in the middle of a conversation.  we had been in the mtc together, where i knew only her last name and that she had beautiful eyes, and now we were recently off our missions and together again, this time on a study abroad.  i quite fancied her and was doing what i could to get to know her better.  i asked her about her testimony, when she came to know that the Gospel is true.  i don't remember her answer (i think she had one or two moments that she cited), but she then asked me.

for me, there never was a time growing up where i "came to know."  in a way, i've kind of always known, but that's not a wholly accurate way to put it.  rather, as i described it to her, there isn't one central event for me, but a whole collection of moments and feelings that, together, build the wall that is my testimony.  and it continues to grow.  each quiet, affirming moment where something whispers that this is true, moments during my weekend when i slow down and something softly chimes inside of me that God is with me, events that come together and things that work out; they are all bricks in my testimony.  also, while it may seem contrary to the personal nature of a testimony and knowing for yourself, the logic, facts, and strengths of my friends become additional bricks.

while i don't have one defining moment like many people have, i have some stones my wall that are larger and heavier than others, ones that i can lean on when others aren't as stable.  and that has proven to be an interesting part of this structure: if something get shaken and seems to fall off for whatever reason, i've got plenty more to hold onto.  like in rock climbing, if the hold you have isn't one you can easily grab onto (a credit card crimp or a big sloper, for example), there's enough alternatives to find something to grab and hold onto.

in related rock climbing news, i conquered that one route on saturday.  : )

1 comment:

The Former 786 said...

That's how I feel, too. I can't pinpoint a single event, but there are so many things that have helped form my testimony.

Also, IF YOU DON'T EAT YOUR MEAT, YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY PUDDING! HOW CAN YOU HAVE ANY PUDDING IF YOU DON'T EAT YOUR MEAT???