Monday, August 08, 2011

bah weep granah weep ninny bong

my hero
 twenty five years ago today, transformers: the movie was released in theaters.  at least, that's what imdb says.  i obviously don't remember.

but i do remember that my dad took me to go see it in the theater.  (he also claims he took me to go see return of the jedi, but i don't remember that.  however, one of my earliest memories at all is my mom taking me and my sister to go see e.t. in the theaters.  that came out in 1982 which makes me pretty young, but it was so bloody scary that that memory is burned into me.  anyway, back to transformers)
the movie is notable for a couple reasons, namely 1) optimus prime, the noble leader of the autobots, in a completely unexpected plot choice, is killed by his arch-nemesis, megatron.  seriously?  that just doesn't happen! (well, it happened in the second live-action movie, but no one cares about those messes of c.g.  but for boys in the 80s, you better believe we loved optimus prime (and still do.)
and 2) the human guy swears.  like, he says s#!t.  it's such an infamous part of the movie (this is an animated cartoon that is essentially a feature-length toy commercial for little boys) that that chapter on the dvd is simply titled, "the swear word."

oddly, as a six-year old sitting in the dark next to my dad, i remembered the other curse word in the movie: before he's about to be killed (yeah, they killed a lot of main characters in this movie.  why?  to make way for the new 1985 toy line), ultra magnus is trying to open the matrix (it's not your "darkest hour" yet, silly) and as the deceptacons (or sharktacons, i can't remember which at the moment) are encroaching in him, in frustration he says, "open, d@*mit!"  for some reason, that stood out to me as kid.

also 3) it's set in 2005.

it's not that good of a movie.  granted,it could be a lot worse, but unless you're you have both an x and a y chromosome and your age was in the single digits in the mid-80s, you're really not going to get it.
but, if you do fit those requirements, then, dang, it's pretty much awesome.
in all seriousness, optimus prime's scene of "megatron must be stopped, no matter the cost" still gives me chills and has me cheering every time i watch it.

michael bay must be stopped,
no matter the cost
if i hadn't spent the evening unpacking my room, i would have been watching it...  (well, and if my roommate weren't out in the living room hanging out with a girl....)

and, oddly enough, they somehow got orson welles to do a voice for it.  it was his last movie.


CK Rock said...

You've got the touch!

Jack said...

you've got the power! you forgot to mention the absolutely spectacular soundtrack...and i, too, remember seeing ET in the theater--scary.

The Former 786 said...

Yes, I got the chills watching that Transformers scene just now. And yes, I chuckled at Orson Welles drunk "AAAAAAAAAAhhhAAAAAAAA."

Plus, the only part I really enjoyed of Michael Bay's Transformers movie was when Optimus Prime said "one shall stand, one shall fall." I cheered.

Also, I'm pretty sure the voice of Starscream is the same as Cobra Commander, yes?

The Former 786 said...

Also, thought you might enjoy this:

Brandon said...

i'm just going to stand up for my future industry here and say that it wasn't cg that made those movies a mess.

from what i understand, transformers 2 was as bad a shoot as it was a movie.