over the years, i've met some girls i've liked, a few i've really liked, and even a couple that have liked me. rarely do these two match up, and i've wondered what i can do better on my part: how do you make yourself like someone? i don't think you can, nor should you have to force it. this has led me to wonder what makes me like a girl. years of close research has yet to yield a magic checklist of qualities, attributes, and quirks, but i have a found a couple of generally common denominators.
denominator the first: can you sing along to my ipod in the car? hardly a factor in determining the stable character of a nice girl, but this really means a lot to me, and does tend to say a fair amount about the person. i'm certainly not saying that i will only go out with someone who can sing along to every song on my nano, nor am i saying that if she does not like my music that the date is over. far from it. heck, my sister doesn't much care for most of what i listen to. although, our strong brother-sister relationship was somewhat catalyzed by our singing along to the mixed tape that played in the minivan as we drove to seminary and high school on those cold minnesota mornings. singing [especially in the car] is something i really enjoy and someone who can joing with me makes it all better.
the bottom line is, if you can grab my ipod, flip through it and find several songs you enjoy singing along to [and proceed to do so], you're a lap ahead of the pack.
denominator the second: do you leave notes? notes, trinkets, surprises, i'm a sucker for them. i like making things and i like getting made things. i didn't grow up in utah where the high school dance culture revolved around 'creative' ways of asking someone out, but i love it. this really didn't blossom until after a few years at byu, but the fire still burns within me. and forget homecoming and preference [mostly because i don't have anything like it around me]--it's not unusual for me to ask a girl on a date with a box of crayons, a coupon, a mystery letter taped to your door at 1 a.m., a film can and a corn cob; whatever i find lying around and whenever the idea strikes me. i don't need a reason, i just love doing it. which means that if you respond in kind, points go on the scoreboard. i guess this echoes that little box i have: i keep the notes taped to my door, the little cranes made out of chocolate wrappers, colorings and flower petals. opening my door to find something left for me: i'm tickled pink.
that's all i've distilled from myself so far. certainly there are a lot of things, some more important than others, but this is the best i can figure.
ladies, now you know.
and knowing is half the battle.