Saturday, September 30, 2006

otoko wa tsurai yo

for a kid who could barely make it through one two-hour session of conference even when he was 18, i sure do get excited about the whole conference weekend now. having traditions and activities that go with it helps, i'm sure. recently, the routine breaks down like this:
  • leave provo at 7:30-ish in the a.m.
  • park at zcmi mall, where parking is free on conference weekend
  • stop at mcdonald's in said mall
  • wait in line to get into the conference center or go to the legacy theater in the joseph smith memorial building, because when we can't get into the conference center, they send us there anyway
  • bask in the spirit of conference
  • borrow some note paper from my sister because i forgot to bring my own
  • after conference, walk a few blocks [past the guy playing his bagpipes] to 'the house of kabob', our new exotic lunch place now that baba's is gone
  • enjoy lunch and have a blast
  • drive back to provo and listen to the afternoon session on the radio
today followed that pattern rather well.
coming back through the zcmi mall, we passed deseret book store and considered waiting to meet john bytheway [giving all nerdy guys hope]. as i was getting on the elevator, i looked across the way and saw a poster for what is evidently a new book entitled 'strangling your husband is not an option' [or something to that effect].

as a generally nice and well-meaning single man who is halfway to 54, i have started paying more attention more closely to husbandhood in society. i have interviewed for the job several times and one day hope to get hired on. yet there are times when i think i would rather apply for a different opening, were there any other options.
society's view on husbands seems rather cynical. fathers are somewhat respected and the word still connotes an amount of dignity, but husbands... they get a bad rep. barnes and noble has an aisle of books with all sorts of titles offering women help on training the men in their lives to be tolerable and perhaps good for something. the general attitude seems to be of the opinion that men are the worst option out there but they're better than all the alternatives. and, if you're smart and crafty enough, you can probably make something decent out of your man.

perhaps that's getting a little too defensive. maybe i'm looking at the most cynical end of the female sociology. i suppose seeing a book being sold at deseret book with a title suggesting that every woman wants to strangle her useless husband really surprised me. i would have thought that the attitude in the lds community would be different.

on the other hand, i received an e-mail in my junk mail bin advertizing a book on 'how to cheat and not get caught'. that wasn't very encouraging for the male species.

...but a title like that at deseret book?

tonight's priesthood session was wonderful. the entire meeting hit me with about as much force as elder [dallin h.] oaks's talk this morning, but what especially resonated with me this evening was the talk by elder christofferson. lehi's counsel to 'arise from the dust, my sons, and be men' aptly sums up his subject. he shared a comment from president hinckley, saying that the woman we marry takes a terrible chance on us; that we will largely determine the course of the remainnder of her life.
that is very sobering, indeed.
the degree of our manhood is measured by our relationship to women.
i think all of us walked out of there with a new resolve to work harder and learn what it really means to be a man.

it takes a lot.
at and times, we don't live up to all that is hope of us.
please have patience. love your husband.
don't strangle him.

1 comment:

Em said...

I suspect, Mr Jeff, that when you do get hired on, you will do marvelously. But if you keep in mind that you are exceptional and then look around you at the rest of the masses who are also eligible for the job, perhaps you will notice some occasional behavioral trends that would understandably be catalysts for the feminist junk.

But I concur that feminism, even LDS feminism has become a bit of a monster.