in other news...

i suppose i should mention that my sister had a baby a few weeks ago.  on august 13, 2008, 1:59 p.m., my little sister becky, with whom i've ridden elephants and tapped danced on temple square, became a mom to a little boy named caleb.  he's got the greatest mom and bestest dad i can imagine, and not only does he look less like a lizard every time i see him, i think he's wonderful.

as an honorable mention, jack and natalie also how have a son, appropriately named "jackson."  i've only met him once; he's great.

let's hear it for the boyz

i was asked a few weeks ago if i wanted to go see "boyz II men" perform at the scera shell in orem and declined; though a mission companion in japan was a big fan of theirs and helped me appreciate their talent, i was never really a fan and didn't feel like handing over $15 for an evening. i hadn't even really heard from them since high school; evidently they were still around, but had moved from playing sold out arenas to outdoor parks in suburban utah.
but when i was offered a free ticket this afternoon, i figured what the heck.

the evening started off with what was almost a minor "tally hall" moment. as an opening act, we were treated to the finalists of another variant of "utah idol star search" or whatever it was called this time. a couple of moderately talented late teenage guys were followed by a girl who looked no more than 14 and gave a strong performance of a country song with great attitude. and i forget the others that came after, until a little girl who looked like she was twelve walked out to sing "i will always love you." at her first note, we were all amazed. she was actually 11, but sang like she was 25. she was incredible, holding everyone in the grassy arena in awe from start to finish, politely leaving to a standing ovation. in fact, i felt bad for the 30-looking guy who came last; after an 11-year old girl like that, only david archuletta could have topped it for that crowd.
as the judges tallied their votes, i started gathering a posse to help me riot if little kalli jackson didn't win. not only did i not need to riot, but it turned out her family was sitting a few people down from us. when she returned to her mom as winner of the competition, i congratulated her and asked for a personalize autograph. and a high five.

among the six of us, we could only name about three of their songs anyway; we figured they'd start with "motownphilly" and end with "end of the road," the staple slow song of any dance in the nineties. the little girl was so good that, like the guster concert nigh unto a year ago, i would have preferred to hear more from the opening instead of boyz II men.

at least, that was my presupposition. the main event began with a video montage reminding us that these guys used to be big, until the venues got small.
but the beats of "motownphilly" sounded forth, and boyz II men burst on the stage with all the funk, fire, and power of the most successful male r&b group of all time.

the whole place went crazy, and those three on stage (yeah, there's only three now) were in complete control. in fact, i hardly danced--i was in mild shock. appearing in sleek, classy suits, they were as good as i ever would have imagined them at their worldwide peak; their harmonies were as smooth, solid, and intermingled as ever, they danced with equal joy and skill. the crowd loved it.
yet what was cooler still was how much they seemed to enjoy it. this was not a "we-haven't-had-a-#1-in-a-while-and-need-to-tour" tour. or maybe it was, which is what made this so great, because they did not seem to expect this much love and appreciation. they burst onto the stage and gave their all, and, immediately, utah valley gave their all right back: a symbiotic love that circulated all night.

it turned out we knew more songs that we remembered, and they also sang some good ol' motown songs, complete with wonderful choreography. amidst all the trends of hip hop, the boys have scrupulously maintained their clean-cut gentleman personas, which is very cool (and certainly helps with their long-lasting appeal around here). except for "motownphilly", all of their songs are slow and soulful ballads, which is great for dances and the like, but i was wishing i had been less "startled" and more "dancing" at the thumping start of the concert. they closed with "end of the road", to which everyone sang along and swayed.
evidently, the crowd's enthusiasm left them also realizing that you can't end a concert like that. (who knows-- in reality, they probably had the encore planned out. still, i like to think they were inspired; it's the romantic in me) they came back out and declared that you can't end on a low note like that; that you need to end on a high note. as such, we were treated to the opening song once again, with even more fervor, no doubt due to their delight at orem's perpetual love of boyz II men. whatever it was, the thousands in the park danced with pure joy. never in my entire life did i think i would have that much fun dancing to "motownphilly."

for what it's worth: boyz II men's "end of the road" spent 13 weeks at number one on the charts, beating elvis's 1956 "hound dog/ don't be cruel." their record was later beat that year by whitney houston's "i will always love you."

wishing this was more creative

on wednesday, i was beginning to wonder if this was a dumb idea: i was going down to texas for allison's wedding and reception.  

perhaps not "dumb", but maybe "overzealous".  

i have two personal faults that gnaw at me, and one is my general non-participation in wedding receptions.  (the other fault is that i borrow things from people and keep them for far too long; i don't forget i have them, i just don't return them.  phil, if you're reading this, i have your seasons of "24" for you).  my fridge has been decorated numerous times with invitations from friends whom i like and love, yet the day comes and the day goes, and i don't go.  so, if i've missed so many, both far (the scort) and near (countless), why was i flying to texas?  (texas, of all states!)

i first met allison when she moved into the ward a year and a half ago.  she was a tiny little 17-year old who was one of four people in our "gospel essentials" class, and i kind of took it upon myself to watch out for her in this new ward.  we went on a date to the premiere of "turnaround," which was a heck of a lot of fun, albeit a little odd when i realized that she remembered the 90s like i remember the 80s, and that she never saw "fellowship of the ring" in theaters because she was too young.  being her hometeacher and good friend was a much better fit.  she was also one of the original tally hall fans.  

i took her engagement pictures and also her bridals (jaime, thank you for your help, both during and afterward).  as she was getting ready to go home for the summer, i mentioned that i would probably have some money saved and some time off, and maybe i could come down for her wedding.  characteristically, she got very excited at the whole idea, and a few months later, i had an announcement with a second invitation to the temple ceremony itself.

so, what the heck.  am i crazy?  perhaps a little.

mostly,  i wondered, would i be in the way?  would i be awkwardly out of place?  it was possible, but i had the ticket, and they were expecting me, so wednesday was not the time to ponder this.

my flight was delayed out of salt lake, which i a) minded, because i only had a ninety-minute layover in denver, and an hour and forty-five minute delay causes problems, and b) didn't mind, because i had borrowed tim's gameboy and was overjoyed to rediscover "dragon warrior 3."

still, i've flown on enough planes to know that nothing is for naught, and soon a helpful lady had me on another flight.   ...that was also delayed.  i further considered taking the "bump" plea concerning our full flight and getting a free ticket, but the family in texas had enough stress without me messing up their schedule.

so far, i remembered why i loved "dragon warrior 3" and why i didn't fly united much anymore.

in texas, everything was great.  i had always connoted a barren land of dusty oil derricks and cattle skulls, which i'm sure are just beyond the city limits.  in town, it looks more like the midwest than the southwest, with open grassy plains, and a wide variety of big and spacious church.  a lot of them.

pulling into the parking lot, everyone came out to greet us, with allison squealing and jumping onto me.  the house was like being at the weasley's "burrow," with all sorts of people going every which way, yet everyone getting along and having their place.  all the beds and cots were full, so much that her brother had been sleeping on an office floor for a while, and any more guests would require us to build bunk beds in the broom closet.

i'd met allison's mom before, and her grandparents (seeing as she lived with them in provo), thus reducing the mild xenophobia that came and went.  in a whirlwind, i was introduced to all sorts of other relatives and friends, during which was suffixed as "the hometeacher."  this introduction would continue through the following day's wedding itself and into the reception, and would always bring a look of dawning comprehension from to whomever i was being introduced.  apparently, the talk of "allison's hometeacher" coming to texas circulated amongst friends and family thoroughly.  sometimes i would explain that i wasn't "just" her hometeacher, that we were also very good friends, and that i don't do this for all my hometeachees.  and, other times, i'd let it go, content with them thinking i was some seriously stellar guy.

the dallas temple looks similar to the chicago and las vegas temples, with a slanted look and the six spires being placed close to the temple and not directly on it.  the ceremony went wonderfully and smoothly, as did the picture-taking afterward.  allison bought me a red bow-tie, to match everyone else.  and, despite forgetting my cuff links, i looked sharp.  the lunch (or is it a "luncheon"?) at olive garden allowed me to make some more friends there, and by the evening's reception, i felt like i fit in down there.

despite my above confession about having missed a great many wedding receptions, i've also been to a lot over the years, and have learned a few things.  if you are at a reception for the duration of the event (for a family member, lifelong best friend, hometeachee in another state, etc.), it's best to get yourself a job.  me, i made myself useful in the kitchen.  (the "oh, the hometeacher!" exclamations continued in abundance here) 

 as evidence of allison's lifelong knack for planning elaborate events, the reception looked more like a senior prom of black, white, and red.  another trait of hers is to be exaggerated and grandiose without being over the top; i've been to a few wedding receptions that seem more like mtv parties than a way to remember the sacredness of being married in the temple.  there was a dj and a dance, but it was classy music and a big band jazz dance.  and i do regret not taking the opportunity to ask a nice girl or two for dance, as i do like to dance.

however, i did get to dance with the bride herself.  a nice slow dance was what i was expecting, but rather than setting aside a song for me, she said "well join in!" in the middle of some song i don't remember, and before i knew it, there was a circle of people around us as she and i danced like a couple of wild pioneers.

until just over a year ago, i had never caught a garter. since then, i have caught the pinata-garter at jack and natalie's reception (love the idea), as well as the one that brady threw at me. in texas i fought off a decent crowd (including mildly yanking it from her brother's hands amidst the frenzy of it all) to win allison's, which i wore proudly on my arm like an old timey saloon owner (it looked pretty cool on my black and grey shirt, if i may say).

despite having enough leftover croissants to supply most of texas in event of a food shortage, we caught our breath from the day and had the house looking presentable again.  allison's mom noted that nothing really went wrong that day, though she related a near-disasterous scheduling conflict at the temple earlier in the week.  as the last of us were going to bed, i genuinely felt like one of the gang down there.  which was nice, because in order to make it to aaron's wedding the next morning, my flight left at 6 a.m.  there aren't a lot of people i'd feel comfortable asking to for a ride to the airport at 4 a.m. the morning after their oldest daughter's wedding, but i had two in texas, now.

my new favorite music video

when it feels real good

like a feeling should

when it's understood

gotta *unh unh* pass it on!

--the fraggles

my mom just e-mailed this one on to me.  

happy day to you all.

(make sure the sound is on)

i think the plural of moose should be "moosen."

remember that one time?

i pruned this from the jamhall, as i thought it was a rather fun idea. it's also a quick way to get a post up, seeing as none of the topics on my "to write" list are feeling particularly generative this sabbath afternoon.

1.  as a blog comment, post one memory that you and i have together.  be there multitudes to choose from, or only one at all, please share it.

2.  do the same on your blog.  i'll write.  

3. good times had by all.

photographic doodling

mark is good about calling me up and suggesting we go out and take some pictures.  and, while the 2:00 afternoon sun is about the poor light of the whole day, we went just the same.

friends on the blogotubes

these are my friends.  chances are, you read some of them, too.

"a window into the williams' world"--my dear sister and her stellar husband.  originally they had two blogs, but, like so many other things in their lives, they became one.  lately, it's often been about be about impending babies, because that's what's going on.

"that's enough out of you, capt. amazing"--my brother himself.  good stories and life lessons about working in an office and videos of kittens.  may or may not be done by a monkey.

"lucky shirts"--jack and natalie.  sometimes about babies (and the frequency will probably increase), sometimes about other stuff, including mountains, families, and broken windows.  and, recently, i heard "the eels" on there.  now i like that.

"cafe rock"--the chris and alyssa.  and a kid rock.  and a pet rock.  and movie talk.  yet not on blogger.  weird.

"pretty much great"--by bekahjo.  the title says it all.

"one happy family"--beej waited until later than most of his friends to get married.  now he's got a wife and three kids.  i like their stories.

"jam hall"--jared and marvia, my favorite people in the state of north dakota.  no relation to tally hall; more like pb&j but for real.

"ready for my close-up mr. demille"--emily and renn and oliver flinders.  like a good documentarian, em has taken a seemingly common subject (be a young wife and mother) and has crafted a wonderful blog.  i haven't been a regular reader in a while, but it was her ingenuity that made me want to get a blog of my own.

"all the world"--leith(al), my favorite person from africa.  i just recently rediscovered her blog.

"spark plug in the sea"--kristin.  she doesn't write often, but i will reference her site when i finally post my tally hall review--she captured the second concert beautifully.

"ramblings and randomness"--laurie jayne.  i put laurie jayne last because i check her last.  i check her last because she is usually the most prolific.  and, as an aspiring writer, she's getting really darn good.  like, seriously dang.

non-blogs that like:

the criterion collection-- this is where i spend my free time.  i've compiled a list to rent from the orem library and am working on it.  i just can't get enough.

they shoot pictures, don't they?-- the best "serious film" site i've found.  the layout/design is horrendous, but for lists and rankings, this is close to definitive.

sight and sound top 10-- a shorter definitive list.  i follow it.

homestarrunner-- always a fan.  meh!

lds.org-- the most correct of any site on earth.

sister tag

my stellar sister did a "blog tag" a few days ago, and while i've got post ideas piling up, this is something i thought would be fun to do.

20 years ago:  

*becky and i came home from school to find mom and dad eagerly awaiting us, dad shouldering a large camcorder.  with barely suppressed excitement, mom asked what we learned in school that day, to which i announced that we were doing reports on different dinosaurs, and i got "anklyosaurus."  this paled when we learned that we were going to disneyland for a week, and i was amazed that i could miss that much school.  the trip to disneyland brought with it all of the memories and wonders that an 8-year old should have.  we went through "the haunted mansion", "the pirates of the caribbean", and "it's a small world"; i got a pirate hat and plastic sword, tim got mickey mouse baseball cap that he wore for a few years after, and dad bought the "sounds of disneyland" or something on a record;  we went to tijuana, where i remember very little, except that it was dark, and that we bought a gold sequined sombrero (which became a staple toy for the following decade) and the wooden chess set that sits on my living room table; we saw the ocean for the first time.  the video of tim (circa age 3.5) getting caught in the undertow and falling down has brought more laughter than the rest of our home videos combined; and, the most treasured memory of all, my dear sister dropped her plate of eggs in front of minnie mouse herself.

*mom was always very good at keeping us busy with summer activities.  i think this was the first year i did "art in the park" (the title says it all, folks), and i probably played some sort of sport (before discovering theatre three summers later).  at the same time, my best friend matt had just gotten a nintendo entertainment system, and i loved going to his house and playing "super mario brothers."  this was back when "video games" connoted blocky figures and simple colors, and when a whole new world expanded before an 8-year old mind.  it was exciting to ride our bikes down to "pick-a-video" at the perpetually-struggling... what was that little mall called?  it had the first "best buy" store outside of minneapolis, where we would walk through the aisles and feel overwhelmed by the media blitz of popular culture.  cassette tapes and compact discs (in the long cardboard cases) showcased all sorts of music stars as teenagers would crank a stereo in another part of the store for a brief moment.  it was scary, but kind of cool.  there was a store that did haircuts, also, and a "ben franklin" store, where you could get a really good stash of candy with the $1.67 that you'd saved up.  how did i get here?  ah, yes, "pick-a-video."  the friendly local video store, with walls covered in vhs boxes, many which made me nervous, and many more which just looked weird or boring.  but the guy who managed the place (i think his name was "dave") was very friendly to us, and they did have one wall for video games.  we'd stuff the $2.12 it cost to rent a game in our socks and bike down there to pick out a new treasure to find.  some games i don't remember, and others are ones that tim and i still pull out and play with affection at Christmas.  i remember the excitement when mom and dad would permit me to rent a nintendo; i think it was about $7 for the machine, and dad helped me set it up at home.  mom would help me figure out how to play "3-D worldrunner", "stinger", or "the legend of zelda", and i was thrilled.

it's very possible that all of these memories were not quite 20 years ago, but the feeling is there.

10 years ago:

*i was graduating high school.  me and jon and rob had good roles in our spring play, were jon was the lead and i wore a wizard costume, made from what looked to be a think curtain from the 70s.  my staff fell apart during the night the show was taped, causing great laughter at the after show party at jon's place; we also encouraged sarah braton to drink too much diet coke there.  at prom i had a top hat and cane; my date had a silver cape.  it was as good as it sounds.

we sang at our graduation (but didn't sound as good as the group two years before us), had some pretty good graduation parties--i scheduled mine to start around the time most of my friends' were finishing.  having had a lot of older friends, i'd been to enough and knew that there's a certain irony in everyone being stuck at their party while everyone else is stuck at their party. soon, we were facing that "american graffiti" summer, before my friends were off to college (most at the university of minnesota) while i was getting ready for a mission.  it was a bit of a torn feeling, watching my friends decided what to buy for their dorm rooms as i was getting ready to leave all of my friends and wear a shirt and tie for the next two years.

* i was working 40 hours a week at sun-mart, the local grocery store, alongside all the old ladies.  ginnie was nice and cool, but there was a grumpy old lady whose name i forget.  janice?  one of us would be in at 8, another at 9, and the third of us at 10.  and we'd be it for a while.  then, around 3 or 4, the high school kids would start coming in.  my friends were at college; i was working like an old lady.

*i received the melchizedek priesthood.  that's pretty great.

*i was teaching sunday school to the 11-12 year olds.  i didn't know a thing about the old testament, but as long as i could read the lesson in sacrament meeting beforehand, i could come up with enough cartoons, voices, giant penguins, and the occasional scripture to teach them that the bible is pretty cool.

5 years ago:

*my roommates were jack, aaron, chris, bret, and the scort.  that was a glorious time to be in apt. 104.  i knew it then and i know it now.  we would have apple beer parties at the end of each semester, where we stole the cushions from the couches in the rec room to cover our 

whole floor, turn the couches on end and drape blankets from them, drink as much apple beer as we could, and watch an awesome  movie.  

*jenny ricks was my best friend.  i wonder what she's up to?

*becky was in brazil on a mission.  i wrote her long e-mails.

*i was keeping busy as a cinematographer on student projects.  it was exhausting.

*i went on a date with whatsherface to "divine comedy."  we ended up in the emergency room.  jack did a dance.

3 years ago:
*i had graduated college and went to oregon to work on a movie called "the sasquatch gang."  it's kind of like "napoleon dynamite" (and made by a lot of the same people).  i sang karaoke there and was a rock star for 3 minutes 19 seconds.  i still keep in touch with one of my friends from there.

*i  came back from oregon and went to thailand, because my sister was there and i knew i'd never have the opportunity to do it again.  i was nervous; i didn't have any time to get the suggested shots, so i had jack give me a blessing.  becky and i rode elephants, swam in the indian ocean, and ate lots of curry.  our day in bangkok is one of my favorite moments; i recently was looking through some old e-mails and found this (addressed to the chris):

there's far too much to take in you
more to find than can ever be found

that's how i felt in bangkok last night; it's amazing riding on a bus, watching the streets of a city full of people who live lives very very different from the style i am accostomed to; to realize how big this world is, and to marvel at the awe of it all.

*i moved out of 104 and into a townhome with beej.  it was strange having little kids as neighbors, of having an address instead of an apt. number, and of having an upstairs.  in all my life, i'd never lived in a place with a second floor.  basements were normal for me; this was different.

1 year ago:
*i was living with mark.

*i was being released as elder's quorum president.  i didn't want to be, but knew it was right.  work really picked up shortly after, and i don't know if i would have survived.

*our ward split.  that was really sad.  i loved that ward.

*i was finishing my first movie as a 1st assistant cameraman, and was starting work on my first salty pictures movie.  working with them has been one of the best things to happen to me in work.

*we were cleaning out our neighbor's refrigerator.

yesterday:
*we went boating with our ward.  i wake boarded, wake surfed, and drove the boat.

*i had to stay for 2 hours after, because tim was still out on another boat with my house keys, and i couldn't get ahold of my sister.  i have since hidden a key, should such a situation arise again.

today:
*i didn't realize it was pioneer day until this afternoon.  i spent most of the day cleaning out our "harry potter closet" (the cupboard under the stairs), and organized the heck out of my camera gear.  it's all put together.  no heck remaining.

*becky and brady and julie and me played frisbee golf.  i'm always surprised how popular that is here.  at first i thought those people with a bag full of different discs were odd.  now i'm feeling like the two that i have aren't enough....

tomorrow:
*tim and i are going to the premiere of the new "x-files" movie.  he wants to wear suits; i'm ok with that.

next year:

*play the accordion

is that "jungle boogie" i hear?

in fargo-moorhead, "skateland" was the roller skating venue of choice (and only one for miles around).  i've probably been there a half a dozen times, although the only two i can recall were the end of fifth grade, when we feebly tried to impress the girls to the hits of "c+c music factory", and for a youth conference a few years later, when rollerblades were infinitely cooler than skates, and when it took all the courage i had to skate next to tami niswander, a nice girl who had openly acknowledged that she liked me (and whose name is now appearing for the fourth time on "sheep go to heaven.")  i haven't been there since, in part because skateland looked like, well, probably like just about every other roller skatery around: still stuck in 1982, with the owners taking full economic advantage of the fact that it's ok to look outdated.

provo-orem's very on "classic skating" isn't much different, except that it's quite popular with the locals, something i attribute to the lds/byu crowd.  which, by generalized definition, pretty much makes me a fan.  i don't remember the first time i went, but disco skating was one of my favorite entertainment staples of the 104 era.  last night was the first time i'd been in over a year.  the crowd was great, wendee and i had a blast, and i came home with the requisite "right-foot-inner-ankle" blister.  and yes, jack, your shirt is still getting used.

walking across byu last week, i found it hard to believe that i graduated almost four years ago.  that's as long as i was in college.  and, thanks to simple math, that's nearly eight years since i started college.  the thing is, all of that feels clumped together in my past, so that it's hard to remember what happened, and when.  last night's super sounds of the seventies did pull out a random handful of associated memories:

* "funky town" reminded me of the chris, of his black hat, white shirt, and suspenders that he would don, and how he got homer's comment, "i haven't felt this way about a song since 'funky town'," because he knew the song before i did.

* of the times when we'd browse d.i. in seach of good disco clothes, which was extremely difficult, since, in downtown byu territory, anything good there gets sold fast.  still, the scort found an excellent white suit for his orange shirt.  he always looked great out on the floor, and "jungle boogie" will always be his.

* watching carrie clark and her brand new pro-skates during "dancing queen."

* of that time we brought my sister and her roommates.  they weren't really the disco skating type.

* but ange, maren, and michelle were indeed disco skaters, as was the great sarah baer, and how they would all be at church the next day with several band-aids on their feet, showing through their sandals.

* how i used to wear my pseudo-sailor shirt that i found at d.i., and of the blue polyester pants with melted holes in the knees from the friction of falling against the floor.  (turning corners used to be a great challenge for me)

* of the time tim and i crashed head-on to one another and helped each other up, laughing.  what he was doing going the opposite direction, we still can't remember.

* the joy we felt when jack found that amazing sequined shirt at "savers."  (actually, i think the scort found his aforementioned white suit there.)  over the years, i think i've worn jack's shirt more, but he looked the best in it.  happily, they played our song last night- hallelujah!

le collection fabuleuse de jeff

c'est jeff.

this is jeff.

il aime rassembler des dvds.

he likes to collect dvds.

il aime les prendre outre de l'étagère,

he likes to take them off the shelf,

les organiser,

organize them,

et remis leur encore.

and put them back again.

the windows of heaven

it feels good to be typing again.

at the start of may, i was offered a job on "high school musical 3" and was looking forward to two months of work with my favorite crew in utah.  but when i found out we were shooting on sundays, something didn't sit well with me.  yes, i had worked a few sabbaths on the last movie i did, where we still held a small sacrament meeting during lunch time, but i wanted to be someone who didn't work on sundays.  after much contemplation and discussion with trusted friends, i gave the job to another friend and looked forward to having two months free.

but things do not always go as we plan.  i had never been so busy in my life.  in response to a friend's question one day, i realized that from the end of january to the first week of july, i did not have a full week off.  work was coming from everywhere, and, in the end, i was still able to be a part of  "hsm3", somehow managing to be there on the show's biggest production number (rumor was that those three days alone cost $1 million), getting in the crew photo, and being there for the free sweatshirts (although i regrettably missed both german days from catering).

in the end, i worked fewer days yet and earned more.  i got to jump to several different projects, some of which were very fun (pretty much anytime i assist brian wilcox is a good day), while "donnie darko 2" ranks among my least favorite shoots in recent memory.  standing out in that desolate field in the rain as the cinematographer insisted we could still shoot while the producers seemed to want to call it a night is one of those stories better remembered than experienced.  and in the midst of all of this, i've still been able to teach all of my favorite sunday school lessons, albeit two were after working an all nighter on high school musical.  i'm told i only said a few weird things.

thanks for checking here in the mean times.

much love to you all. 

on a sunday evening

i liked this article.

and this blog post.

good sabbath to you all.

reality tv

life on tv is so interesting.  even mundane life is fascinating.  if it wasn't, it wouldn't be on tv (granted, there is plenty of evidence to the contrary on that point, but now is not the time).  

tim is a big fan of scrubs, and since he watches it a lot, i tend to see it, too.  the show does an excellent job of looking at the challenges each of us face, be it difficulties of work, the quest for love and the ensuing paradoxical relationships, loneliness, or just finding our place in our own lives.  the caveat is that, despite dealing with essentially real problems, because the people in the hospital have both writers and an audience, their struggles seem so much more interesting, exciting, and noble.  seeing zac braff get chewed out by dr. cox is very funny; watching him and his best friend celebrate their minor successes is cool; and his narrations over the pains of loneliness seem so profound, while our own lives look bland by comparison.  their trials look fun. ours, not so much.
so easy it is to get caught up in it, wishing that our lives were exciting like that.   but not even exciting because we're hunting down terrorists by ourselves, or becoming the next media pop sensation; tv can polish even everyday life just enough to make us wonder why our lives don't glisten like that.  it's easy to get caught by the sparkle.
if fabrications can be this interesting, then what about the original? our joys are true; our loneliness is sincere; our stories continue on.  if it's ok for our tv friend to fall short, to feel lost, then so much the more for us and our friends.
what i do love about scrubs, and what i think gives it its strength and reason to keep watching it is not the comedy (although it has given me more moments of genuine out-loud laughter than any show in a long time) but their honest admission that all of us are, so very often, just barely making it through each day.  and that the only reason we haven't collapsed in on ourselves is because of the people around us.  no matter how together some of us may seem, there probably isn't as much as strength as is displayed, and the stability that we do have comes from the people standing on either side of us, in front of us and behind us.  that's really cool.
but now it's time to turn off the tv.

see caspian

i was surprised at how much i enjoyed the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe a few years ago.  in fact, it tied with millions for my favorite film of 2005.  this was nice, because after three years of getting a great lord of the rings movie for Christmas every year, 2004 felt empty without any swords or wizards.  narnia successfully filled the void.

i didn't grow up on the books (i read it just a few days before i saw the movie), so i held no nostalgic bias.  but i loved everything about the first narnia movie: the casting all around, the battle at the end, aslan, santa claus, and the beavers.  especially the beavers, although i'm not fully sure why. 

last night we were at the midnight:05 showing for prince caspian, the second entry in the filmic series.  it's been one of the movies i'm most looking forward to this summer, since the first was so darn good and last night did not disappoint.  it was everything i wanted it to be and then some: as good as the first, and sometimes better.  

and it seems that everyone felt it was as good as the first, although bear in mind that everyone has differing opinions about just how good the first movie is.

this morning i perused the review websites, hoping to see praises galore for the movie.  i was a little disappointed to see moderately positive reviews, citing the films flaws but saying it's generally pretty good.  as i read them, i usually agreed with the stated weaknesses (it doesn't have the character depth of lord of the rings).   nevertheless, for me, i dare say it will be on my top 5 movies of 2008.

go check it out.  it's oh so good.

and if you have young ones, keep in mind that it's got some pretty hefty fight scenes.  like the first movie, the battles aren't bloody, but they're tough enough to make you feel that it's a dangerous place.

perfecto

the chris was once meeting the family of a girl he was dating.  as they were talking with him, they became impressed with his interests and accomplishments. "is there anything wrong with you?" they asked.
"well," chris admitted, "i don't like sports very much."
"even better!" said the family.

everyone is looking for a perfect match, but everyone's "perfect match" is different.

someone like you

i was once lamenting to a friend about a girl whom i liked but didn't like me back.
"why would you want to be with someone who didn't like you?" he asked.

that question is either ironic or irrelevant, depending on how you take it. one could argue that, "well, i wish she would like me." otherwise, it makes its swift point, leaving you with no option but to concede they're right.

at church today, i was looking around and saw several girls i think are pretty. "i'd be nice if she had a crush on me" is an easy thought to nurse. yes, it would be nice to have one of the pretty girls from church interested in me. but when i imagine that, i also imagine that her interests are the same as mine.  i want to her like me and to like coming to classic movie night and to sing with me in the car and to read my blog with the same rapt attention that you have right now. i don't just want her to like me, i want her to change to be everything i want, and automatically include that when i imagine if she liked me.

how often does this happen even in relationships where people do like each other? that, even when there is a mutual attraction, we want more than them to like us: we want them to like all that we like, and to be all that we imagine could or should be.  it's hard to step back and remember that we liked them they way they were, and need to continue to like them for them, not for us.

in reality, i really don't have any serious interest in anyone at church; i just got thinking about the whole thing.

too much or not enough

in seventh grade our school play was "backstage broadway revue," a hodgepodge of short scenes, songs, and monologues. my shining moment was playing a "baby" with mary soumala, in which we sang a song about it being ok to be who you are. i was proud of it, as it was one of the few roles in the play that wasn't a large ensemble piece. my best friend jon, however, had a monologue scene that was actually rather good. he talked about the literal out-of-place physicality of the junior high years, being too tall for some things, yet too small for others. jon was often short for our grade (while i was tall for the times), so this made him an ideal choice for the role (he was also a good actor, a rarity especially then). "too old to go trick-or-treating, too young to drive," he lamented. "too tall to play on the playground, too small to ride the rollercoasters."

a decade and a half later, it's easy to feel the same way about dating.

reading and writing... for kids!

i'm helping cheryl out at her elementary school.  it's wednesday night, shortly after 9 pm.  taking a break from organizing pictures from a field trip on iphoto, i glance over at the book order and see a book entitled "the cat-- you go, graduate!" it looks like something that may appeal to children, but all in all, it looks rather silly.  further inspection reveals that this is a sticker book.  even in elementary school, i had no interest in those; still, kids in my class did order them, leaving not the question of who buys this, but, rather, who makes this?  were they proud of it, or is it a sort of embarassing job, and do they really want to do graphic design for a high class ad agency, or write for time magazine?  is the photographer, using an extreme-wide angle lens to photograph a cat in a graduation cap, hiding this in their resume, or is this a marketable style, off which one can live well?

scanning the rest of the book order cover, it's easy to look over it and think that these are written by writers who never achieved their dreams, and to feel the tragedy with that.  perhaps they dreamt of being a new york times bestseller, and yet have produced nothing more than a short series of paperbacks featured in an elementary school book order.  and while not everyone's life success is based on their professional accomplishments (i've been working with adam baldwin the past few days; on his imdb page, he says that acting is not his life's work; his family is. that's oh so cool), professional success is not determined by the most glamorous or critically acclaimed, either.  there's a good chance many of these people are doing what they enjoy: writing for children.  

when i was in fifth grade, the robert asp middle school had a book fair.  the lunchroom-gymnasium was filled with wheeled bookshelves that could be folded shut and rolled away, off to the next school.  near the back corner of the room, close to the right side of the school stage, i saw a book entitled, my teacher is an alien.  i generally liked school, and never suspected my teachers as being anything more than good people, but this title was still too much to resist.  i loved the story, and it turned out to be by the same author as monster of the year, another book i'd picked up earlier.  the author was bruce coville, a name i didn't need to look up or struggle to remember.

throughout my middle school years, i loved bruce coville's books.  jeremy thatcher, dragon hatcher; the monster's ring; stories about boys my age but where my imagination wanted to go, where the fantastic was allowed to mingle.

of all of his books, the my teacher is an alien series was the best.  the first three books were each written from the perspective of a different student, all introduced in the first, providing not only wonderful viewpoints of mutual events (although the stories were largely separate from one another), but also three very distinct narrators, allowing a middle school mind to experience varying characters and backgrounds.  of that series, the third book has always been my favorite (it was also the last one i acquired, if i remember correctly).  my teacher glows in the dark picked up where the first book ended, with the nerdy kid choosing to leave with the eponymous teacher-alien.  what was so enthralling about the story was that the boundaries of imagination seemed to have been taken down.  mr. coville created an alien spaceship and culture that, even now, seems as realistic as anything i've heard of, provided we let ourselves believe in an alien superculture.

unlike the aliens in the majority of sci-fi, be it the hallowed "star wars" trilogy or "aliens" or whatever you like, the creatures are just scary, goofy, furry, slimy, or different creatures.  but they're still creatures--like something we might find in a cave in the himalayas or the yucatan.  the captain of the spaceship put it best, bemoaning, "you carbon-based life forms are so molecular-centric.  until you meet another form of life, you seem convinced that carbon is the only way to grow." (p.30)  the reasoning behind this is clarified when you know that the ship's captain was best described as a large tank with crystals floating inside.

and that is what i loved about the story.  aliens who created with smells, others who were seemingly little more than a shadow, communicating through flickering; explanations on how language translation works amongst a multitude of races; descriptions of how a ship moves across intergalactic distances, and even transportation within a spaceship the size of new jersey (incidentally, the ship is named, "the new jersey" for that reason).

and when they discuss the issue of humans developing interplanetary travel (which leads to the thesis of the whole series, one that gets overly preachy yet still raises good questions for young readers), the captain explaining they "don't mind you exploring your own solar system; there's not much there anyway.  but if we cannot allow you to carry this sickness, whatever it is, into the galaxy at large," well, things like that just let my mind wander.  (page 32)

"i nodded to him, and he made a gesture which translated into, 'i salute your sinus cavities'--something i'm sure had more meaning for him than it did for me." (p.88) 

for writing children's books, for making them available in scholastic book orders, for letting my imagination roam when i was 12, and for sustaining the wonder a decade and a half later, mr. coville, i salute your sinus cavities.

ctr

i've been thinking about what it means to choose the right.  it is easy to think that when we make the right choice, that things will get easier, that our struggles will lessen.  it really sounds like that's what should happen when we do the right thing.

in the end, it always will.  choosing the right will bring us the rewards we really want, the deeper happiness, the greater security.  in the end.

but the end rarely comes right after we make our decisions.  very often, choosing the right means following the road less traveled.  things get harder.    we don't see the results we were seemingly told would come when we chose the better part.  we think that choosing the right will bring ease, comfort, immediate happiness, and/or a clear and obvious success.  it's then that we begin to wonder, "did i make the right choice?"  "did i do good?"  "does it matter?"

the answer is a resounding, YES!  and after the choice has been chosen, after we have made our selection because we saw it as the better half, the nobler part, the wiser path, we then step into shadows.  this is the exciting time, when we can hold on to what we believed, remembering that we did, indeed, choose the right.  often, this is a battle within the quiet walls of our hearts, fields where no one else knows of our struggles.  yet these silent choices are what shape us into who we become. 

wait for the reward; it may tarry, but it will come. 

as if once wasn't wonderful enough

OHBOYOHBOYOHBOYOHBOYOHBOYOHBOYOHBOY!!!!

jaime just told me that tally hall is coming to provo again.  may 24th.  just over a month away.

oh wow.  i spread the word to the local hall fans.

this is the best thing in the world.