pretty much the best volunteer job ever

so last saturday i hardly got any sleep, getting home late from san jose and getting up early to volunteer at a baby contest. now, i'm not really sure what i think about the idea of a baby contest, where parents subject their infant children to the scrutiny of strangers [college kids with no formal human-classification training]. on the other hand, the kids are too little to understand whether they are judged to be a 'good egg' or otherwise, so it can't be too damaging. [reportedly, there were some 18-month olds who could do sign language....]
my job was help with the stroller congestion. i made myself a sign that i clipped on my back and a smaller one for my front, saying 'my name is jeff and i can take your stroller for you.'
may i say, i was a darn good stroller patroller.

now this weekend, i'm working with the stadium of fire. the same girl who got me involved in the baby event helped us sign up for the stadium of fire and promised us 'cool jobs'.
man, did she come through in spades.

i didn't get on as an assistant stage manager, but me and my friends are on the props crew. the morning was kind of slow, as we didn't really know each other or what we were supposed to be doing. but i did like the perks like having giant coolers all over the cougar stadium full of drinks for us to take at our heart's desires, the cool official passes that hung around our necks, and the occiasional golf cart drive.

the run-through rehearsal tonight, however, was aweseome.

me and mark [my new roommate] got ourselves some radios also, making us look that much cooler and official, so much that some teenage kids asked us how they could get passes like ours.

but we didn't have time to talk, as we made our way through the crowds down to the tank.
yes, a large, real tank.
we made sure it was able to move around without killing anyone as it drove onto the field to fire at the end of the opening patriotic number.
and to the credit of the adolescent dancers on the field right in front of it, only one girl lost her poise when that thing blasted.

from there we rush back to the other end of the stadium and help set up for the family competition, hosted by raven symone. on our way, american idol winner taylor hicks passes us in the hall, and he looks me in the eye. i've seen about a total of five minutes of the show that brought forth his fame, so i feel a little sheepish about bandwagonly thinking it's cool to see him,
but he does have one heck of a strut. i would have voted for him for that alone.
why he looks at me, i cannot say for sure. but i have been told for many years that i have a very distinctive walk [though i think it has changed over time] and i think he can sense that in me.....

the actually competing families will not be playing the games tonight, leaving the amazing props crew to enact the bedlam for the rehearsal.
raven comes out and is pretty cool, being a genuinely good sport while reading from her cue cards that seem rather inaccurate as she introduces the families.
game one has mom putting a hot dog in a bun, then having child #1 shooting 'ketchup' from a classic-style bottle across the stage onto said hot dog.
mom passes to dad, played byy me, child #2 repeats with 'mustard'. i then run over
to raven who slops 'relish' on the hot dog and places it on the tv tray.
repeat.
whomever has the most at the end wins that game.

we won, and i left rather soaked. i'm very grateful that tonight was just water, and not the corn-syrupy condiment concoction that we will be making for tomorrow.

something happens on the main stage, but i forget what.

game two involves dad [again played by the author of 'sheep go to heaven'] being dressed in several layers of clothes, each family member adding a different layer. we again whalloped the other family, and got my picture with the former 'cosby show' actress.

attention then goes back to the main stage for battle of the oldies tribute bands. this exhibition is made up of 'majesty' the queen wannabes, 'still surfing', channeling the great beach boys, and 'almost abba', who are almost swedish.

what makes this really kind of fun is that each act also has a group of groupie-dancers down in front of their stage. while i have respect for queen and all those who try to be them, and the beach boys' 'pet sounds' is my #1 'desert island' cd, it's 'almost abba' who really does get me
dancing for all of this.
with 'dancing queen', 'waterloo', and 'mama mia',how can i resist you?

then mr. hicks comes out and sings his songs.
sure, whatever. i like some of kelly clarkson's music that i hear on the radio, but never have gotten into american idol.
this dude does play a mean harmonica, though. that's really cool.

us prop crew peoples are hoping he'll be a little more of an entertainer tomorrow night when there're actual people in the seats.

but we just hang out with raven on our little side stage.
now, i do feel a little guilty about this.
see, i know her mostly as that cute little girl who said cute little things to the legendary bill cosby on what is probably the greatest television show in history.
but she's done a lot since then, evidently even having some show where she has psychic powers [works for me....] and being friends with hilary duff. this means there are lots of cute teen and pre-teen dancer girls all around us who would give their right foot to talk with raven, yet the
security people keep them away from her. while we all sit and talk about american idol and how none of us really know much about it.

said she, 'for someone who's a tv personality, i don't watch much tv.'

i feel better for not having seen her eponymous show.

please don't imagine us sitting there in normal clothes. rather, picture me in a clear poncho, wearing safety goggles [raven gets trendier-looking safety glasses] and a hat that looks like a rather shallow bucket with large nails coming from it, for that is indeed what it be.
see, for game three, the family members throw water balloons at dad, who attempts to harpoon them and catch the water in the bucket-hat and dump it into another bucket.
as fun as it sounds, and our family won again, getting me on camera with raven all over the stadium's nu skin big screen in my goofy get-up.
you really don't imagine these moments in your life, but when they come, you treasure them forever.

we used water today, but for the actual event, it will be a goopy corn syrup mixture.
goo, indeed.


yes, i'm rather sad that i missed an invitation to go to lagoon, but this was a seriously dang evening.
i'm excited for tomorrow.

[i'm in the red shirt in the back, there....]

mess

...her sick lullabyes...

and now that i sit down to write, nothing comes out.


every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end


p.s. you rock my world

six days to heaven

i don't recommend shooting a feature-length movie in six days with non-actors, an improvised script, no budget and very slim pre-production; especially if you have minimal film production experience yourself.

yes, it was quite an experience.

it was a very frustrating and trying experience at times, to be sure, but the interesting thing about film production is that every project brings with it advantages and disadvantages. it was nice being the big guy again, fun working with people who had no egos and were simply interested in learning about making movies, and i do love teaching people what i know in those moments of down time.
and i love setting up a light and making a scene look better, even if i only have one kino and a bounce board....

and i met some really cool people who liked my work and asked me about working on other projects they are doing later, so this could be a springboard for bigger things.


i learned a few things about myself down there.

i learned that i will not give false praise. if i didn't think a scene was very interesting, i could not bring myself to tell the director otherwise. but i am also not one to speak unkind things [well, they do slip from time to time, but i try my best], and so work to say what good i can about a situation.

i also learned that i take my work seriously and do my best to do my best.

i learned that i will often not fight for attention, but will let others have it if they want it. that sounds like a good thing, but sometimes it doesn't feel like it.

i got to see 'newsies' on the car ride home and really enjoyed it. [making my sister very happy that i finally saw a movie that she thinks makes me more 'cultured'.]
i also saw the new 'pride and prejudice', although i couldn't hear it very well. i thoroughly enjoyed it and would be interested in knowing what they were saying.

i'd been to 'in and out burger' once before, and thought it was perhaps a little overhyped, seeing that they only had about four things on the menu; and while it was good, i couldn't see what all the fuss was.
we stopped at one in reno on the way home, and i loved it.
but that's because i learned something about it one the drive there;
there are 'codes' you can use to order.
for example, if you order a burger 'animal style', it comes with sauteed onions and some other goodies. 'protien style' comes wrapped in lettuce, sans the bun.
when we got to the cashier, my friend asked the girl what other styles there were.
her eyes darted, and she said 'that's all that there are'.
what a poor liar.
but a great marketing campaign.
because now i really want to know what other styles they have, so that i can be part of the inner circle.
we both got the 'animal style'--very delicious.

i learned something else interesting; kirk was pitching an idea for his dream movie and naming the actors he'd love to have play the roles. for his star, he mentioned someone i'd worked with before, and i groaned. i explained that this actor was, in my opinion, difficult to work with and not very disciplined, which kind of make kirk reconsider [this was just a dream list, but still....] what's interesting is that, on that project, i was just a lowly loader, quietly working in the background, and this actor never even knew my name. yet now i was in a more influential position, and my observations of this guy carried some weight.
so remember that people are watching you at all times.

driving back from san jose, we took a few wrong turns and got to see san francisco [pretty cool] and a town called 'cool, ca'.

final word:

police officer: 'i saw that you slowed down to 93 as you went around that curve, so i knew you weren't a speed-crazy. what were you doing, anyway?'

chelsea: 'singing along to newsies.....'

not the way i imagined it

long story short: i am leaving in a few hours to drive to san jose and shoot a feature-length movie on a video camera for seven days. this promises to be interesting.
if i can't post while i'm down there, i'll have a lot to say when i get back.

right now, i am just really tired.
i don't think i'll be sleeping much for a while.

jeffrey g and the self-fulfilling prophecy

as i mentioned earlier, i've been reading the complete calvin and hobbes lately.

i grew up reading calvin and hobbes, their antics being an indespensible part of the morning, along with the far side, garfield, peanuts, cathy, blondie, hagar the horrible, beatle bailey, and pretty much most every other strip on the page that wasn't a 'dramatic' strip [i've always wondered, does anyone read 'mary worth'? what about 'rex morgan, m.d.'? maybe it's really suspenseful, were i to just give it a time to learn the characters....]. interestingly, i usually read 'the lockhorns', too, even though i didn't think of it as one of 'mine.' i never laughed at it, but then, i never really laughed at most of the strips apart from 'the far side' and 'calvin and hobbes'.

sadly, i think most of the strips exist on the page for that reason--we don't laugh at them, but they take roughly 23 seconds to read, and so become a habit small enough to maintain without demanding much result from it; it wasn't funny enough to warrant even a smile, but i have read 'blondie' for today.

i remember reading a sunday strip a few years ago that i wish i would have saved as an example. it was 'the born loser', one of those never-funny staples that only appeared on sunday.

first frame: man is standing in the open doorway, apparently coming home from work; his wife is standing inside.
text: 'hello gladys!'

second frame: looks the same as the first:
text: 'hello [whatever his name is]!

i imagine the cartoonist leaning back, relaxing--yes! two frames done already....

third frame: blocking of characters is roughly the same.
text, man: 'i doubled the value of our car today.'

fourth frame: again, little change.
text, wife: 'oh, what did you do?'

final frame:
text, man: 'i filled it with gas.'

and guffaws all around!

i use this only in contrast to reading calvin and hobbes.

bill watterson took the current condition of the comic strip and raised the bar far beyond where it was [and likely perhaps were it had ever been] to an outlet of artistic expression worthy of preservation along the apexes of any other medium. he cites 'peanuts', 'pogo', and 'krazy kat' as other great works and sources of inspiration. i am unfamiliar with the latter two, watterson himself lamenting that they are unavailable and unknown nowadays, and i know peanuts only from their waning twilight years.

the strip was not only very funny, but also insightful and thought-provoking. in fact, it was more-often intellectually stimulating than it was consistantly laugh-aloud funny. many episodes do not end with a timid attempt at a 'punchline' [as do nearly all other funny page series'], but with a smirk or a wink and a smile, as though watterson is being as humorous as he needs to be here, because you have been presented with a thought or conversation that is more rewarding than a laugh.
as the reader, we agree.

calvin and hobbes is a world full of ideas. occasionally, and especially in the later years, the three or four panels were melded into a one or two frames when conciseness was all that was needed. but there are no wasted words or wasted space. commentary and philosophy [both urban modern and neo-classical] abound in paragraphs within the tiny world.

that is not surprising, when both characters have as their namesakes notable thinkers of the recent few centuries. calvin's materialistic and cynical attitude comes from the great fatalist john calvin, while the outside-humanity observations of his tiger come from thomas hobbes, a philospher whose dim views of mankind are recorded in such writings as 'the leviathon', one of those great works so far down on my 'to read' list that i will never get there.

in addition to it's rich writing, 'calvin and hobbes' is a work of visual art. said robin williams, 'bill watterson draws chairs and lamps and tables that are fun to look at.' the writing is so engrossing that it is easy to fly from one frame to the next, yet there is so much to see and appreciate. no one ever remains in the same position; the characters are alive and move, sit down, stand up, adjust their glasses, rest an arm on a chair, or wave their hands as they pontificate. the sunday strip colors are equally impressive, sometimes delicate and brilliant in a landscape, and sometimes breaking into artistic monochrome for a single panel, using the attributes of the medium.

in a sense i cannot define, i think the strip and its ensuing world is so beloved because it rings true within each of us. i felt uneasy a few nights ago when i found some of calvin's rantings sounding a little too familiar in my own voice.
but calvin is only six years old: he isn't fully accountable for his actions yet, and is trying to figure out this world into which he is stepping. he knows that poll results are what make changes, although doesn't understand where those numbers come from; fantasizes of doing well in school and the accompanying warm glow of success, despite being a complete nightmare for ms. wormwood and the nameless principle, and he readily finds things more interesting than book reports; is perplexed by girls yet deep down seems to suspect they may be valuable at some point [that susie continues to say 'hi' to him throughout the years is itself a remarkable tribute to the kindness of girls everywhere]; loves his mom and really does trust her for everything despite kicking and screaming at nearly every attempt she gives to help; and at the end of the day, he is a little kid who just wants to be with his best friend and feel safe.

last night, calvin's dad was going through the mail they recieved, noting the fashion magazines which pointed out now imperfect we were and promised to supply products that would fufill the same needed it had created and thereby provide happiness and self-worth; magazines selling lifestyles contructed outside of reality that we did not know existed but now need.
and, since we live in a soceity based upon such free market consumerism, to throw away such capitalistic propoganda would make him some sort of terrorist [this was back when terrorist was a funnier word].

the series gives us commentary and observations on the exploding society in which we live; a world that is changing and growing faster and bigger than anyone can begin to understand; one in which we feel like six-year olds.

when we need to step back from the confusing reality and be with a friend, 'calvin and hobbes' is our stuffed tiger.

goats go to hell

em got me into this whole blogging thing.
[i've never called her 'em', but that's how she refers to herself, so i'm just trying to fit in; i think 'mle' is cooler, personally]

i got a Christmas card from her [probably hand-made, although it looked like something from a trendy downtown store] that had some web address stamped on the back.
being that this was in the barren winter months, i checked it out and found that it was a sort of journal she was keeping on-line; an amusing commentary on her evolving life that revolves around her husband, her job, and the bun in the oven. reading it, oh how i wished for a desk job from which i could muse about the oddities around me.

with all that time to think, i wondered if i could write something worth reading.
maybe, although i also really liked the look of her blog, with a cool layout and color-scheme, and i know nothing about web design or computer programming stuff.
i didn't know how to make a blog.

come to find out, that's all a template at the click of a button. my awe of mle remains unaltered [i think she's a super-hero, and all this stuff she writes is a just a clever front], and i'm am happy to find that i could have a neat-looking blog, too. [i sometimes see other peoples' blogs that are much more design-ish, having broken from the provided templates. i get a little envious and curious, but their content is generally so dull that my worry soon dissipates]
her wonderful choices of pictures was a big inspiration, too.

and thus began the end of my personal journal and the start of 'sheep go to heaven', which i think is a fine blog name, although i am very, very happy that my site address is what it is.

my personal journal, which i actually kept pretty faithfully for nigh a year or more, is somewhat bland. i hate the thought of crafting any sort of good or interesting writing in a place where it would most-likely be read only when i'm in the cold ground; it seems like a travesty. if i put work into something that i think is cool, i would like people to notice it.
so my decendants will all think great uncle jeff was a poor writer.

i really should be saving these postings somewhere of my own, just in case the blogger.com servers get hit by a hurricane or a meteor or charging rhino [i have no idea where they are].

but i love writing in this far more than i ever imagined.
part of it is due to the medium, that i can write in an anonymous environment, then put it out for all the world to see. no deadlines, no editors demanding more public-pleasing material or that i 'be more funny', or even that i check my facts [though i do try to keep a sort of professional discipline here, for my own good].
i would like to think that there are scores of readers from around the world who have 'yousaidyoudbakeusacake.blogspot.com' bookmarked as a part of their morning routine, and the occasional comment from an unknown screen name fuels such dreams. yet, i know that i have even half a dozen friends who like to hear about jeff, which is really a better audience that masses who don't know me. [and if jekakah doesn't get her new job, my readership extends into alaska....]

still, my goal is to one day be featured on the 'blogs of note' slot on the site's homepage.

...but those seem reserved for blogs with a theme, like the guy who ranked every single beatles song and provided commentary for why.
or m.c. hammer's blog.
i did like the blog that was written entirely in 'wookie.'

even in one post, there are multiple outlets of expression:
generally, the posting itself is an essay on some idea or theory, a journal entry with enough care to make it readable and hopefully entertaining, or sometimes just a piles of thoughts.
but i've also got a title from which to work, where i either set the tone for the following writings , or else express a completely different thought or emotion [the 'goat' stuff], often obscurely enough that only i know what it's referring to, so that i have emoted without any sort of unnecessary exposure that i may regret or blush at later on.
the picture goes the same. sometimes it reinforces one or both of the others, or sometimes it speaks from the more quiet chambers of the heart.

reading a lot of my old e-mails, i am often a little disappointed with myself. my ideas weren't very developed or well presented, or i was irrational and thoughtless in a moment, or i worried and fretted over that which was of little consequence a short time later. perhaps that means i have grown since that time.
as i re-read my postings here, i don't feel that way.
i feel pride [the good kind].
i'm happy with what i've written.
there have been days when i've wanted to write rain or heavy fog or hellfire, but i considered that this was going before all the world and history, and re-considered what i wanted to leave.
i've done alright.

here are nine postings i like:

wouldn't it be nice

the other first best picture

reason #256 why i love my sister

my movie

and maybe it's time to live

planet telex at the video store

what it feels like for a 2nd a.c.

only a lad

dead man's party

to all who have read my blog, whether you check it every day or just stumbled across it and read a post, thank you.

meow

meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow. meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow; meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow. meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow; meow meow meow meow meow me'ow meow meow. meow meow meow meow meow meow meow-meow meow meow. meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow.

meow meow meow meow, meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow 'meow meow' meow meow meow meow meow meow [meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow], meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow; meow, meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow? meow meow meow meow meow meow, meow.
meow meow meow meow meow meow meow. meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow. meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow; meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow. meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow.... meow meow meow meow meow meow. meow meow meow meow 'meow meow meow meow meow meow'. meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow; meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow. meow, meow meow. meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow.
meow meow meow [meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow] meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow? meow meow. meow meow meow me'ow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow; meow meow meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow. meow.
meow meow meow.

writer's blog

or would it be called 'blogger's block'?

whatever it is, i have a case of it.

i can't write.

i have composed numerous essays and possible themes from which to write in my mind, yet none do i feel are worth putting up here in blog #98.
i have considered quoting jane austen, discussing my senior year of high school ['98], or last night's incident of the towed car and the unsettling display of female talent that followed in obtaining the car; all ideas terminate in frustration or futility.

nothing to say.

nothing to comment on .

like a wet bottlerocket.

declaration of principles

work can come out of nowhere in this freelance life.

today i turned on my phone to find a message from some guy in salt lake whom i knew by name only. he was looking for a loader on a movie in town next week. monday through friday, paying good rates with a good-sounding crew; three panavision cameras [easiest cameras to load] on a nice truck and shooting all days [no nights]. just what i needed, i called my baseball boss to see if he could part with me for a week. it turns out they had called him for the same job... he told me to go for it, so i called the guy back and said to count me in.
wow. maybe i could afford to ghana to next month.

when i gave him my e-mail address, goose@byu.net, he asked if i was a byu student. i replied that i was a cougar, and he told me that this movie was rated-r, and asked if i was uncomfortable with that. i appreciated his consideration on that, i asked to have some time to think about it.

talking about it with a friend on the phone, the answer came more clearly than i thought it would.
most jobs outside of the mtc [which happens to be where my friend teaches] are going to bring with them a less than ideal environment. coarse language is unfortunately difficult to avoid. and i have worked on several projects where the crew members cursed so frequently that they may as well have been doing a scene from 'goodfellas.'

but the difference with doing an r-rated movie is that my name will be attached to it. i will be working to produce a product that will not be something i am pleased to be connected with [and i am speaking from a moral standpoint, not artistic; i did work on 'the r.m.', after all]. i try to take my job seriously, giving my effort and time to and end result that i feel is worthy to have 'jeff gustafson' appear at the end of it.

that understanding provided the answer and reasoning i was looking for.
the choice was no longer a question.

i went through nearly every camera-friend in my phone in trying to find someone to take my job--it did give me a chance to get caught up with some old school friends, and in the end i did find someone to take the job.

that has always been a bit of a question for me.
it feels good to have an answer now.

talk of cicadian rhythms

i thought i had beat it.
getting back to my house on tuesday around 5:30, i was ready to collapse, but after a much-needed shower, i felt somewhat invigorated, and so finished out my day, with highlights including the two-hour season finale of '24' with some other friends who had missed it and were dying to see it.
yes, jack bauer did save the world.

i went to bed at 12:30 that night [a good time], and awoke to the sun shining in and the sounds of childrens outside my window. no, it was not 10 or 11, but 2:13 p.m.
wow.
14 solid hours of sleep to complement the 32 that i enjoyed getting from east to west. and when i was getting yawny later that evening, i thought i had pulled it off and was on occidental schedule.
but alas, i cannot beat my biology.

read 'the complete works of calvin and hobbes' [the comics, not the philosophy] [actually, those classifications are rather inclusive....] until 1, tossed until 2, and must have slept for a few hours, because i next remember having dreamt and felt a severely 'asleep' left arm.
and so now i have a jump start on my next day.
i can write, read, and wal-mart and macy's are open 24 hours.

the catch is that i will be getting dead tired about the time i head to work.
i need the money, but crashing my car on i-15 might not be worth it.

back from the future part II

tokyo: 6:55 p.m., tuesday may 30
utah: 3:55 a.m., tuesday may 30
jeff: somewhere between now and then

....well that was interesting...

when i was in jr high, there was a new pop test marketed in our area called 'ok soda'.
ok soda was more or less what you got when you mixed all the soft drinks at the fountain, only now the work was done for you. it was all the rage and had a campaign that had a very generic 'brand x' style.
their slogan was, 'somehow, things manage to turn out ok'.

they do.

get off the shink at tokyo station and the caravan moves briskly down several escalators to and happily find that we can go from the station direct to the airport [makes sense, really]. the train comes, and in a rush i ask if we can get on that one. they say and we do, only to realize why the man said we would have to stand if there were no seats: we were jumped on the 'reserved seating' car. this occurred to us just as the train was pulling out and all the people were looking at us as we awkwardly sat down on the floor next to the luggage compartment. when the man came for our tickets, he chewed me out for not bothering to learn how trains work in other countries and sent us one car down where there were open seats.
arriving earlier than we planned at the airport, we went up as many escalators as we descended in tokyo, albeit much more 'baggage friendly' here. we passed through at least three different security gates of various scrutiny-levels, including the northwest airlines version, where i asked to have my camera bag hand checked and was also selected for a random luggage search by a friendly guard who said that he was also a photo hobbyist.

when i met up with the fam, plans had changed: mom and dad and t had found another flight directly to minneapolis [thus avoiding the 13-hour layover in sfo]. the flight was boarding as this was spoke, and so we exchanged 'thanksforthetriptojapanitwasfuniloveyougoodbye's' and that was that.

so now my sister and i are sitting on a lovely plane which offers video on demand ['new world', but no 'syriana'] and are not too far from the aluetian islands at the moment. in some passport-showing line shortly after leaving mom and dad, we discussed the catch that neither of us are entirely sure what airline we are taking out of sfo.
but we know the time it leaves, and we've been in stickier situations before.

it's good to be with my sister again. she pointed out that we hardly saw each other while we were in japan. i hadn't noticed that, but she's right.
now that it's just us, the trip has an entirely different feel.

amongst other things, i am trying to see if i can work my finances to go with her to ghana next month and build houses.

why i love japan:

i love that the old lady working the souvenier store still talks to me in very polite and courteous language, and even my postcards are wrapped up and placed carefully in a paper bag which is then taped closed and handed to me with two hands.

i love that i can feel completely comfortable asking anybody i see for directions, and that if they do not know they way, they will often go find someone who can help me.

i love that the girl pushing the snack cart through the train bows politely when she leaves the room, and the that guy working the counter at starbucks bows deeply when he hands a customer their tray.

i love that there are no places i know of where i should be afraid to go.

i love that everything from warning signs to bus passes have cute cartoon animals on them.

back from the future

kyoto to tokyo shinkansen: 10:46 a.m., tuesday, may 30
utah: 7:46 p.m., monday, may 29

the bullet train [or 'shinkansen', as we say in the far east] is a wonderful contraption, resembling the child of the serpent from harry potter's 'chamber of secrets' and a rocket ship. speeding through the mountain landscape upon which the sun has risen and shines brightly, i wish we could take this all the way across the ocean. the ride is generally smooth [as i type, it's rocking more than i have ever felt, and that's not very much], and last night it got us from osaka to kyoto in under 15 minutes. that's pretty dang.

no matter how many times i do this, i am always amused by the phenomenon in which i leave the airport at 5:00 tuesday afternoon and arrive in san francisco at 9 a.m. that morning. the dark side to this amusement is that, for reasons i don't quite fully understand, adjusting to the time difference is much easier when going from east to west. coming back, it's something akin to a nightmare; i will be getting sleepy around 4 in the afternoon and bright eyed and bushy by 4 or 5 in the a.[m.] looks like i can get finally watch the first season of 'lost'.

yesterday we had the experience to see something quite rare. we were visiting 'sanjusangen-do', one of the ancient city's most famous temples [where temple recommends are sold for 600 yen] in which there are 1,001 buddhist statues [1,000 standing at about 5'; the other 1 is about 10' tall], walking down the incense filled hall and marveling at the grandeur of it. up ahead, in front of the main deity, was solemnly assembled a buddhist wedding ceremony. the couple sat up with the priest, he clothed in rarely-seen purple robes, the bride in pure white and the groom in a black and grey kimono. off to the side were two assisting monks in green, who carried sacred tea and candles, and below sat the parents, who must have had some great influence in arranging such a sacred ceremony [not to mention the two photographers and a videographer in a hall where photography is otherwise prohibited].
simply being there to see such an ordinance was fascinating, and to see the performance of some rites, coupled with the unnusual hand positions of some of the statues in the temple was enlightening.

the last day of our journey, it seems we were finally getting a rhythm down on how to travel with the five of us. hop out of the temple [after buying several charms from the temple gift shop--these charms have become the favorite for souveniers: they are small, affordable, and kind of cool], skip on to the bus, and jump onto the train to osaka.
standing on the platform, a train pulled in across from us, listing 'kakogawa' as its final destination, very cool because that was one of the areas in which i served as all those years ago [and a bit odd, because it's not a major stop in that area]. to make further awesomeness, that train pulled away and the one behind it was bound for 'shingu', another area in which i served and not that commonly seen in the kyoto station. little tender mercies like that are indeed awesome.

from train to subway, we make what was probably the last required stop in the trip, the 'hard rock cafe osaka'. so now i have my shirt.

another subway or two and we were at the osaka aquarium. costing a whopping 2000 yen to get in [~$20], this place was rad, boasting 7 floors of fishies, sharks, seals, and even monkeys! i like monkeys.
cool though the monkeys be, our favorites were the otters. maybe a subconscious leftover from when we would cheer for the fergus falls otters even when our high school played against them, watching these little river otters hobble around and play in the water made us giddy. but the sea otters stole the show. probably four or five feet long [depending on the tail], the were big enough to be enormously cute as the paddled along on their backs past the windows, chewing on something or just washing their ears.
you just want to put one in your suitcase and take him home.

other than the otters, the penguins could have entertained me all afternoon. like ducks, i admire penguins because they are not the most beautiful or graceful of the fowl, but they seem completely content to be the bird they are and do the best can.
they just be penguins.
they waddle around on legs that look to be little more than ankles and feet, so that even a gradual incline requires concentration and some risk, hold their arms out like a little kid when they run, and enter the water essentially by falling over. yet they all stand there, in the their tuxedos, with an enviable expression, seemingly thinking, 'dang. i'm a penguin. rad.'

yes, there were underwater creatures, too. the king of them all was the whale shark, who's name says it all [the largest fish in captivity] and around whom swam a school of little fishes, presumably using him for protection. also of weirdness-note was the sun-fish. probably nine inches wide and 5-6 feet tall, this guy has a fin on top and one on bottom, and that's how he gets around. with a mouth that looks perpetually open, he doesn't look like the brightest star in the sky, and i almost feel bad for saying he looks strange. i'm sure he's very smart and has a wonderful personality.

coming in as a dessert to the visual feast were the jellyfish. i think a jar of two or three jellyfish would make wonderful centerpieces at my wedding reception. simply a biological mystery on how they are even 'alive', they move through the water like blobulous dreams, transluciently phasing between this world and some unseen astral plane. so beautiful and tantalizing, yet when i see those poison wires trailing behind them, the dream is gone and the venom revealed. but from behind glass, they are my 'squishy.'

**it is now 12:30, about 40 minutes out from tokyo; on my right are fields of tea; on my left is mt. fuji, largely hidden in the hazey distance. dad is nervous that we will not make our flight. i'm curious myself, but i think it will happen; i've cut it close plenty of times before. not that i condone such behaviors; i wish we were comfortably ahead of schedule, as the trains going from nippori station to the airport run only every hour, i think. but i am not worried.
onward.

kyoto and the brown mcdonald's signs

kyoto: sunday, may 28 11:28 p.m.
utah: sunday, may 28 8:28 a.m.

now this is something kind of weird: i still remember my missionary apartment phone number. not a clue on how to get to the church, but i know the phone number--only in japanese, mind you.
looking for directions on how to get to church, i called the number, wondering if they were even in the same apartment six years later.

yes, but they are now sister missionaries.
that's little weird to think about, but not a lot.

so we had our directions, and left in good time, except that the lady standing in line in front of me was taking her sweet, very long time, while other lines had moved through everyone else who was there when i got there, plus severel more newcomers.
i could remember how to get to the station by the church, so we had to stop and ask directions at the kyoto station.
my sunday morning sabbath patience was being tested a little.

eventually we got directions elsewhere, and our comfortable space of time was now into the 'just gonna make it' zone. again, a hop, skip, and hurried train change and we were back in my area; southern kyoto, where me and elder reid kamakamapohaiheahola kapapa were in charge of preaching the restored gospel to all those who live there.
walking in the general directions the nice sister gave me, the neighborhood was looking vaguely familiar, but i still wasn't too sure where to go.
then, as we came to an intersection, we saw two nice girls walking their bikes.
suddenly, i was grateful that old lady in front of me had spent so long ordering her bullet train tickets....

and so the sisters walked with us to church.
'walked us to church' is perhaps more correct.

it was very cool to be back there.
actually, it was a very special experience.
i think missionaries generally remember the people more than the people remember them, and i was curious if anyone would still know me, or would they look at me and say, 'you used to be missionary here, right?'
the bishopric sitting up front were new, but all faces i remembered. and they all lit up
when they saw me. i don't think i even said my name, yet when the first counsellor opened the meeting, he recongnized 'elder, now brother, gustafson' as visiting here with his family.
yoshi visited with us. i don't think she knows much about the Church, but both of the talks were very good for her to hear.

afterward, i talked with some of the members, and among other things explained that neither becky nor yoshi were my wife. one of the girls had gotten married in march to a nice guy from peru who has lived in japan for the last twelve years; that's really very cool, and also a bit of a relief, since she had quite the crush on me last time i was here, and i was a little nervous about seeing her again.

in the hall i introduce mom to sister hishii, who is indeed one of the sweetest and nicest ladies on any continent. she had me translate some embarassingly kind remarks to mom about me as a missionary. but i'm glad mom got to hear that.

we asked yoshi if she would be interested in the missionaries explaining a bit about the Church to her, which she accepted. the sisters did a great job [hooray for sisters!], and when i shared my thoughts about the gospel, i think that really helped yoshi understand that this is more than just a place to go on sunday mornings. she left with a book of mormon [now available in a much lighter soft cover version....]

at some point here, i do have to admit something that i discovered over the last few days:
i can't speak japanese.
i'm getting great at asking for and understanding directions, but since we've had yoshi with us and the opportunity for more advanced conversation has presented itself, i have taken a look at what i have wanted to say vs. what i have said, and, if i do achieve over 40% success, i still sound really weird.
not going to get me down, but i need to study more.
me talk pretty one day.

our kyoto sight for today was kinkaku-ji, the golden pavilion, the older and much more famous brother to the 'silver pavilion' that we saw on friday. yet, as i said, i like the silver one better [even though it's not really silver]. this one really is gold, and it's
pretty dang to see. you pay your fee, walk around the corner, and bam!, there it is. and so you and everyone else takes a ton of pictures. we managed to hold a up a rather long queue of visitors so that we could get a family shot. if they minded, they were silently minding.

unlike the silver pavilion, once you see the gold building in all its splendor, that's about it. so we hurried out and hopped on a long bus ride to try and make to the hall of 1,001 statues before 5:00.

going from northwest kyoto to the central southeast on a bus can take quite a while.
and when the temple closes their gates at 4:30, well, we just missed it. we stare at the big iron gate for a few minutes, hoping that we could stare it down, i suppose.

we couldn't.

waiting in line for the bus again, i struck up a conversation with a pack of jr. high kids. kids in japan seem to be in their school uniforms every day of the week, and always on field trips. i don't understand it.
the leader of this pack was the spokesman, but couldn't speak very much english. his buddies, however, could do alright, and so i would answer his questions or ask him my own and his friends would translate for him as needed. it was an exceptionally entertaining way to pass the time as we watched four or five buses come and go, too packed to fit any more people.

we gave up and decided to walk.
down the block we saw a curry place. we never really ate the same food twice here, which is a good thing.
and for becky, a good thing is curry.
and we had a great lunch from a very friendly curry staff.

being americans, we needed our after-meal sweets, preferably chocolate, and made a beeline for the circle k just down the block.
they didn't have any 'morinaga' chocolate bars, my favorite, but they did have some very classy looking chocolate bars, available in 72%, 86%, and even 99% chocolate. the 99%
chocolate was 30 yen more for 30 grams less, which i took to be a sign that this was the good stuff. and i love dark chocolate, further reasoning that this must be great.

to quote my sister, 'boys are dumb.'

the first few moments of the bite was pleasing. it tasted like chocolate. i like chocolate.
yet, like some horrible joke store gag, the pleasing taste quickly fleeted, leaving a nasty taste, not unlike weeds. that unpleasantness soon gave way to the most awful, bitter taste i can imagine, which grew more and more intense. i had no choice to but grab one of dad's bite-size klondike bars and dispel the hell-born taste.
at least i amused everyone else.

and yet, there is a strange human tendancy, to see someone in pain and, when they say 'try this,' to try it.
people are dumb.

is it wrong to say i felt somewhat validated in watching all them wretch in equal agony?
certainly, i was punished for buying on the sabbath.

out of curiosity/stupidity, we also bought the 86% and 72%. the 86 is still too intense for pleasantness, but the 72 is pretty good.
i still prefer dove dark chocolates, for those of you keeping notes.

finishing our trek to the station, yoshi pointed out that all the mcdonald's signs in kyoto are on a brown background and not the usual red.
i think i had noticed that, but never gave too much thought to it. afterall, this is japan; their toilets are either have control panels or are a porcelain hole in the ground; every kfc has a statue of the colonel out front who looks like he may come alive and kill you at any moment; weird-colored mcdonald's signs don't stand out in the big picture.
she explained that kyoto is such a historical and refined town that the yellow on red looks too cheap and gaudy, not presenting the image that mcdonald's wants. so they changed it to brown, to be more subdued and refined, hoping to harmonize with the vibe of the citizens.
that's kind of cool.

yoshi's bus left from the kyoto station, but she left her bag at our hotel [the bus leaves at 10:30 p.m., she sleeps on it all night, and arrives in tokyo at 7 a.m., just in time for work on monday morning]. i took this as a chance to have little 'me and kyoto' time, and volunteered to go back and get it while they did whatever they did at the station.

it was nice to be by myself, to walk the streets and ride the subways of kyoto.
this is my city.

i have no proof or even much of a genuine claim to it, but until someone challenges that, i will relish in the romaniticism of it all.

we spent the evening on the open terrace, atop the 12th floor of the station. low-lit and very beautiful, you can sit and look out over the city in its peaceful night time luminescance.

when it was time, we walked down to the subway, where i translated as she expressed her love and gratitude to our family for all that we have done for her. she calls mom and dad 'mom' and 'dad', and she does feel like our sister.

after all these years
they remember 'gustafson'
heart fushimi ward

reptiles and samurai

kyoto: saturday, may 27 10:02 p.m.
utah: saturday, may 27 7:05 a.m.

"we'll have an adventure
"and several long trips
"we'll make lots of friends
"and maybe get a bite to eat

as we went to bed last night, there was talk that yoshi was planning to come down to visit us today, and a quick e-mail from her said she would be there in the afternoon. at least, i think she said 'afternoon'. yet i awoke to a phonecall from her, saying that we was waiting at the temple were were going to see that day [this 'one stop a day' plan was really working overall].
so we scrambled as best we could, still having some questions about the kyoto bus system and had to stop and ask a nice policeman for directions; he asked me if i spoke english or french. i wonder if he could speak french.

kiyomizu temple is probably the most famous temple in kyoto, due to its grand nature and remarkable views of the nature and the city from it's balconies on the mountainside.
i avoided the busy tourist street on the way up; if we walked there, it would take hours to get to the 'pure water temple'.
while i didn't see them, i heard that mom and becky got a picture with some maiko girls walking the streets; blast.... my fifth time here, and i still don't have a picture with those mysterious ladies.

we entered the temple by washing our hands and mouth at the font out front, then bought our recommend for 400 yen or so.
by now i was throwing all cares about the cost of film and developing into the wind, and shot all that i wanted to here, including several experiments with 'soft focus' and wholly out of focus images. i'm curious to see if there's anything interesting with that.

walking along, i noticed two girls about my age who were looking at me. i smiled back,
acknowledging that, yes, in a country where americans are rarely seen, i'm relatively
nice and interesting to look at. they pointed to their camera, although my quick hope of celebrity was flashed when they wanted me to take their picture. from their use of charades, i gathered they weren't from around here; they knew enough the name of 'korea' in japanese, and that seems to be about it. i tried to say i had spent a [crazy] day in seoul, but discovered that i don't know how they pronounce it.
at least they got their picture.

nearly all temples and shrines sell little 'charms'--if you have ridden in my car, you may have seen my little 'traffic protection charm' i bought last time i was here. it works wonders.
my dad bought my mom a 'happiness charm', which was returned with a happiness kiss. and mom bought all three of her children 'get married' charms. actually, i think yoshi got one, too. we all displayed our charms as we gathered round the rock which houses the god of love. so things should get interesting from here on out.
at the offering box to the god of profession progression, i tossed in a 5 yen coin, hoping to get more work when i get back.

the draw of kiyomizu temple is its eponymous 'pure water' which parts into three waterfalls, under which you can stand in a line to take a cup-on-a-stick from either the old lady or energetic jr. high student in front of you and drink from the holy waters yourself. truly, these are blessed with health; i have done it every time and never gotten sick.

now that the culturing of the family had been accomplished for the day, we could take all the time we wanted down this street, looking at whatever junk we wanted.
and we did.

this has really been a good street for me in my japan journeys. as a missionary, i saw a wonderful door curtain that i regretted not buying and so came back and bought it when i was a study-abroading student. it hangs in my door as i type.
on this trip, i decided i wanted to get a 'yukata'--a summer kimono.
and so i found a nice store that looked decently-authentic for its location and price, tried one on, like it, and bought it.
and so mom found one, too.
and so did dad.
girls' yukatas are little more elaborate, and so the lady dressed becky in a kickin' purple one with a red wrap--she looked so good that we all commanded her to buy it.
and she did.
tim bought two-piece lounging thing, and has since declared to wear it everday.

yes, we are a cultured family.

i was afraid food would be a big expenditure on this trip.
not so.
for reasons i really don't feel like analyzing right now, restaurants in japan generally serve only one kind of food; ramen places serve ramen, sushi places serve sushi, takoyaki places serve takoyaki. and bowls of meat and rice places serve bowls of meat and rice. we ate at a bowl of meat and rice place.
the beauty is in the simplicity:
walk in
put your money in the ticket vending machine
push the button that has the picture of the food you want to eat
sit down at the counter
give the ticket to the guy
he gives you the bowl of rice and meat
you eat it
your family does the same
everyone is happy

really a rad country.
i am going to miss this rich eating establishment system.

enjoying his english bus map provided by an exceedingly helpful train booth worker [i ask where i can buy a bus pass; he comes out a few minutes later to see i got it alright to give us five english maps], dad has begun to figure out how to get around this town. he found us a route to the subway that including a walk through a 'shotengai', a sort of covered strip mall; good place to slices of japanese life. dad found a store selling all sorts of old movies on dvd for 500 yen a pieces, and excidedly bought 'the african queen'. watching it in the hotel room that night, he kept commenting on how many scenes he didn't remember being there before. i don't know if the fault lies in my aging father or the questionable asian dvd market.
i pointed out a 'shakey's pizza' joint where we ate as missionaries.
mom took my picture in front of it.

kyoto mon amour

kyoto: 11:57 p.m. friday may 26
utah: 8:57 a.m. friday may 26

today's activities would all depend on the weather:
sunny weather, we go to kiyomizu temple.
drizzles, we go to ginkaku-ji, the silver pavilion.

it was drizzles, the perfect environment to see the temple, because that heightens the aesthetics around which it was designed. built on the thought of finding beauty in the simple and sad, the grey sky and quiet rain act as a sensual 'surround sound' to the artfully subdued grounds.

standing at a quiet two stories, ginkaku-ji's main villa is of dark brown wood and white rice paper doors. in front spreads a pond of koi, silently swimming as trees stretch forth in classical asian fashion. a hall of worship provides a bookend to one corner of the area, and also provides a platform for moon viewing.
since the moon was not available, i used it to photograph people enjoying their history's culture, including three tough looking biker guys, who, like most tough-looking japanese guys, were quite friendly and sincere, and four lovely ladies in kimonos, who impressed even the throngs of high school girls.
betwixt the temple hall and the villa is a finely raked rock garden and shape that looks like the bottom third of a cone. as i write, i realize i really don't know what it's made of; it stands about 4' tall and looks like it's made from the gravel of the rock garden. its purpose is to cast shadows during moon viewing.

ginkaku-ji is perhaps my favorite sight in kyoto. avoiding any sort of sensationalism, it's artistry and elegance come from patience. the longer you spend there, whether sitting by the temple hall or strolling through the gardens, the more delicate beauty you find. i could spend all day there.
kyoto is, in fact, much the same way.
paris.
london.
new york.
there are major cities all over the world, each unique and alive, and all have people in love with the metropolis.
for me, that city is kyoto.
thriving in the modern age with a populace of 1.2 million people, history and old japan is more intricately interwoven here than anywhere else in the country. to know kyoto's history is to know japan's history, with traces of the heian period [1100 a.d.] still very visible.

we wandered through the major downtown streets, where high-rise buildings stand over traditional shops and paper lanterns lining the way. we turned down another unsuspecting avenue, where bamboo walls and wooden doors were all that was to be seen on the cobblestone streets.
twice, we saw a white-faced maiko gracefully scurrying from one establishment to another. like a glimpse of a fox in the woods, she was a fleeting vestige of old kyoto. some of the doors we passed advertised their menus, traditional meals costing over $100 for small but delicate dishes. yet others presented nothing. they were tea houses or sushi restaurants in which clientel are by invitation only. this is gion, once the great entertainment center, where geisha entertained with such legendary skill that we make movies about them today.

to walk through downtown kyoto from twilight to the neon nightlife was one of my favorite events of our trip.
to just be in kyoto.

now, karaoke bars and pachinko parlors offer entertainment just as gion did centuries before. there are no memoirs of the geisha here, just callers dressed deceptively formal outside of naught places.
i suppose i am on my own personal 'cruise' when i'm in kyoto. i was loving just being there, and could have walked the streets all night.

the rest of the family, however, thought kyoto was nice, but was getting a little tired of walking. for becky, travel to another country isn't that fun if she is not building a house or saving the world in some other way. plus, she was getting rather annoyed with a technologically advanced first-world nation who seemingly did not appreciate the research regarding the dangers of tobacco. that, and us getting lost in finding the subway wasn't helping either.

the takaragaike prince hotel of northern kyoto was not quite the same as the tokyo conrad. situated just outside of the bustling city, it is a rather popular spot for the business class, as the odd-looking kyoto international conference hall is right next door. the staff was friendly and spoke english well-enough that, when i didn't feel like speaking japanese, we could get along fine. and i'm sure that 20 years ago it was a beautiful place.
but it has since then fallen into disrepair. no bugs or anything horrendous like that [and you do not want to have a japanese centipede in your dwellings, let me tell you], but the carpets were discolored, the wallpaper was coming undone at the seams, and other such small things. still, these were some of the biggest rooms in all of kyoto. dad and tim were totally cool with it, but i felt a little bad for becky and mom.
in a cheerful hyperbole, becky compared it to the 'happiness hotel.'
the bellhops all looked cute in their uniforms.

last stop: this town

kyoto: 12:59 a.m., friday, may 26
utah: 9:59 a.m., thursday, may 25

as i sit here in my yukata, typing away, my sister [also in her yukata] searches through her biology as she does an on-line quiz on my dad's computer, the only one that has internet access, and tim [again, yukata-ed] sits on his roll away bed and looks through the gifts he received today. two hours ago, i could hardly see how i could make it home awake. now, i'm feeling alright.

today was our day in hiroshima.before i go any further, i would like to kneel on the floor, bring my head to the ground, and, in the humblest japanese i know, confess to the shinto gods that i have stupidly tried to plan too much to do in one day, and pray that they may remove their curses from upon me as i remove activities from our schedule in an attempt to have time to actually enjoy what we are doing.
i have no priest to wave willow branches over me in purification, so i will have to trust that will be sufficient.

yes, today was our day to visit hiroshima. it started out great, with us leaving in time [well, 30 minutes past schedule, still in good time] and the family wandering into a nice little bakery while i was buying bullet train tickets. thus, our breakfast consisted of wonderful pastries, usually filled with cremes and other lovely things.

the ride to hiroshima was literally a trip down memory lane, albeit at 150 mph. going west of kyoto, we passed through areas that i served in, which i pointed out to the moderate interest of my parents. the bullet trains really are like a first class airplane, with seats that are wonderfully large and provide ample leg room, a soft chime when nearing each stop, and a uniformed girl who walks through whilst pushing a cart, offering drinks, candy, and toys in soft japanese.
my mom bought chocolate covered almonds from her. a chocolate-loving companion once pointed out that, despite having created infinite wonders in the realm of bread, the japanese have taken chocolate and either put it in bar form or dippedalmonds in it, thereby assuming that they have reached the culinary perfection ofthe chocolate sector. no peanut butter cups, no candy bars, just chocolate covered almonds.
off the soapbox, they were rather good chocolate covered almonds.

in between the passing of said box of chocolates, my sister studied microbiology, mom and i looked through a book of 'must see in kyoto' [i highly recommend it and its accompanying series, should you visit this land], tim was lost in his ipod, while dad enjoyed the quickly passing scenery, occasionally pulling out the video camera to record something he thought was neat. much to the frustration of my mother, my dad finds scenery to be the main strength of a camcorder.

reaching hiroshima was a reminder for me, the new single mother of four. to describe what happens, i will relate our experience coming back from the peace museum and heading to the next venture, an island:
when i think, 'we hopoff the streetcar and running to catch the next train, i imagine reaching the station and hopping on the waiting train [because i researched this last night], with a quick stop in the bathroom if need be, and perchance a flurry through the convenience store for a bottle of 'pocari sweat' [yes.] reality, however, was different: we get to the station and captain dynamo [a.k.a. 'jeff'] runs to find out where the train is to go to miyajima, while pointing the kids into a quick convenience store. for whatever reason, i generally don't think much about food or restrooms when i am traveling [indiana jones never did either, why should i? same with jack bauer], but i concede that my family does like to eat and that this short stop would be a good time to get food before we get on the train. everyone buys food they think they can enjoy [i get a rice cake wrapped in seaweed, a cheese flavoredcake with a design of the northern island in it, and a 'morinaga' chocolate bar, the best in japan], and we are off. except that mom reminds that dad says he wanted to stop at mcdonald's. ok, a hamburger doesn't take but a small moment. soon, however,they are all gathered around the counter, where the manager has presented an english menu [odd, since the names are pretty much the same: cheese burger = 'cheezu ba-ga-']and who seems to speak as much english as my sister does japanese. mom and sister run off to the restrooms while dad waits for the food and tim wanders around to proclaim his love of this country and potential future plans to move here some day. our food is presented in a bag the size of a grocery bag and dad hands it to me so that he, too, can run off to the restroom. when everyone is back, it is obvious that we have too much food to take on the train [japan has a thing about not walking and eating at the same time; i don't know the consensus regarding eating on the trains], and even if we could find room in the busy restraurant, smoking is allowed, and the food is already going to kill us fast enough. the small plaza in front of the station is agreed upon, and we sit down next to some flirting teenage kids and amidst pigeons who are thrilled that mom throws bits of her bun to them from time to time.
as i enjoy my mcchicken sandwich, surprisingly well-sized and tasty for being on the100 yen menu, i ponder why i am the way i am; why did i get so frustrated with the above situation? i wasn't angry, but i felt myself getting short with people, both inside and out.

that's kind of the way things went, and i think i will be a good mother when the time comes.

as for the sights and sites hiroshima, the atomic bomb dome is like no other place on the face of the round earth. the building was one of the few sites remaining after 'little boy's' blast only because the bomb went off directly above; tim can explain to you more about how that works. visiting, it is easy to wonder, should we take pictures? do we smile in such photos? like so many other questions of culture, it is best to watch what the natives do. when they are smiles for the shots, i think it's ok for us, too.

however, you are not here for long before a junior high student will come up to you and ask to interview your in thickly-accented english. for, you see, this is part of their homework, to find an english speaker and ask them some questions. this interrogation ranges from 'what is your special talent' [making chocolate chip cookies], to 'are you good at rock paper scissors' [i'm a pro] to 'what do you think of the war in iraq' [i never got asked that one]. and often they ask to take a picture with you at the end. this was really cool at first, but when each of us were on our fourth or fifth one and hadn't made it to the musuem yet, it was starting to get old [i began answering 'why did you come to hiroshima' with 'to do your homework']. the group of elementary school kids who just wanted me to sign their notebooks was fun, though. i felt like i was famous.

the peace museum itself is one you could spend hours at. reading history and documents of the time leading up to august 1945, seeing video of the actual blast, artifacts and remnants of the event, the man's shadow burned onto the sidewalk, and pictures taken at ground zero just hours after is intriguing. then to remember that this is not some history museum in minnesota about europe, but that you are HERE. that the spot you are now standing on is that empty wasteland on the post-blast model on the first floor. only one other city in the world can come close to such a claim. tim, with his study of nuclear physics and its power, found the museum very difficult emotinally and had to hurry through it.

that would have been a good day, but we had come this far, it would be a shame not to visit miyajima, one of the three most beautiful places in japan. so another ride in the streetcar, dinner at the station [see above], hop on a train and then 10 minutes on a ferry, and we see the big shinto torii gate in the water. really pretty cool and one of THE most picturesque images of the land of the rising sun. like nikko, this soon became a race against time, although becky had time to get some pictures with her byu bookstore bag and a very, very friendly deer, as well as the rest of us to get shots before the sun was all the way gone. and we saw a tanuki.

but we had a long ways to go to get home, and japan is not a country for late night public transportation [having the missionary rule of 'be home by 9:30', you never really think about these sort of things]. the bullet train ran only to osaka, which is about 30 minutes south of kyoto; nevermind us being tired and sleep most of the way to osaka, from there [now about 11 p.m.], we had to find a regular train to get us to kyoto station. tired and exhausted, we arrive in kyoto station and make our way down to the subway, only to find that we missed the last subway to our hotel by seven minutes... had we just made that other ferry off miyajima, could we have made it? as we consider the day's chain of events, mom suggests we blame the school kids at hiroshima. works for me.

taxis in japan are expensive, but after midnight, they are really your only hope. the driver would accept four people, but not five. dad and tim went ahead and managed to have a conversation with their driver while i conversed with our driver. i feel like my japanese is getting sloppy and i could proper it up [while becky understands a surprising amount], but this guy was chatty and we had a great time, despite me using horrible grammar and probably speaking more rudely than i ever intended at times.

now, it's late, i'm really, really, tired, and glad to sleep.

tanuki at ev'n

living fluffy 'mid the shrine

girls get excited